I’m a little strange– I like interviews.  If I didn’t have to don a suit, I’d interview all the time.  These days, I’ve been going to several, and they’ve been great– the conversations are interesting, and I get to learn more about different industries.  But today’s call from an HR department took me by surprise.  In addition to an in-person meeting, they also want me to VIDEO TAPE myself and submit it as part of the process.

Is this becoming a trend that I’m not aware of?  This isn’t a hi-tech company, nor does the job require pretty people or performers.  And given that they’ll meet me ANYWAY this week, do they really need video footage??  Oddly enough, as a PR person, I’ve prepared many people confronting the camera–offering advice on everything from how to sit and speak to what clothes to wear.  I’ve made small talk to soothe an exec’s nerves before an interview, while gently coaxing him to smile and button his jacket.  I’ve helped a candidate practice strange words so he doesn’t look ignorant on screen.  I’ve even cut short a taping to prevent a “gotcha” maneuver by an aggressive reporter.  I have no problem calming someone before the lights flood their eyes, the blinking red dot warning that every action is under scrutiny.

But now it’s my turn.  Where’s my support staff?  Who’s going to chat with me and fix my hair?  And why on earth does this elicit mortifying fear in me?  You see, I look HORRIBLE in most pictures.  For some reason, the camera hates me, usually transforming me into a banshee/skull-faced weirdo.  I have no clue why, but there are very few pictures where I actually look, well, human. I suppose this isn’t the first time I’ve had to sit on the other side–but I haven’t done this in a loooong time, and I forgot (or perhaps blocked) how much I HATE my televised image staring back at me.  Public speaking has never been an issue, but when you add a camera to the equation, my stomach starts a hyper dance, predicting all the potential flaws the lens will mercilessly expose.

I suppose I’m just going to have to give myself that pep talk, grit my teeth, appear personable, and get in front of that camera.  After taping, I’m sure I’ll be traumatized enough to permanently erase the memory….until the next time of course.